Walmart Stories.

But first, a photo that has nothing to do with anything that I'm talking about:

Ok, I have a feeling this picture is really going to distract from the story, but I don't care. Whoever knit that hat deserves a major award.

SO. I went to Walmart today (please don't judge me) and, as I was pushing the crappiest cart ever around the store, I noticed that I was getting a few stares from creepy men-not to mention-dirty looks from old women. I know why. My "cute" friend Jenna (pay no attention to the qoutes, unless you're Jenna) let me borrow her little black strapless swimsuit cover up and I was wearing it as a dress. Whatever. I was totally rocking it. I don't usually feel self concious, but in this case I started to think that maybe I should have worn a bit more clothing. But for real! It's been 100 degrees for 3 days now! I was roasting. I don't like getting an ugly heat rash. I despise sweat. I wore the cover up. Whatever. Again. On with the story.

So here I am, pushing the cart with my 3 little girls all hanging on it, when some dude walks past me and almost breaks his neck staring. Blech. I gave him a crusty look. He kept staring and he kept walking...right into a huge display of diapers! As he collided with the countless boxes of diapers and they went crashing to the ground, I couldn't help it. I started laughing histarically and then bolted down the frozen foods isle. I got the heck out of there.

Moral of the story: If you have to be a total Walmart pervert, watch out for the diapers, dude.


-J